Reality Mirrored

Mirrors: We see ourselves, yet not
In these things that reflect light
Be it the still lake or a clear cloud or glass
We find ourselves judging our present and our past.
Yet mirrors can distort reality too
The car's rear view mirror draws objects further from you
So dangerous if we know not this perspective
It can lead to a death edict
Snow White's stepmother may have been told the truth
But mostly in mirrors we see what we want to
The most 'beautiful' person can spot a blemish or two
The 'ugly' could look beautiful too.
'Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder' 
So today even more I ponder
What does the mirror tell us
As a holiday is given for a temple constructed
Its base the ruins of a mosque
Of a line cast that had the country torn apart
In the name of God who urged peace and sacrifice
In the name of a God to whom not all ascribed
But today, God is created by us more than we by him
Hymns we sing are stories we weave to please our whims.

22 Jan holds more terror more for me than the Babri Masjid fall
With no protests, no riots, no fiery street debate wars
Then, we had fiery editorials, and more people openly appalled
That the Constitution was repelled, that divisions we spawned
Today, we keep silent wondering if to post at all
Fearing repercussions beyond hate posts or calls.
I remember us peperring our school walls against the demolition
Today, I think twice about a Facebook post expressing abhorment
I have abrogated my rights for so called safety
Economics and politics and so-called institutional duty
What the mirror tells me today, I like not
A spineless creature supposedly distraught by life fraught.

- Written on 22 Jan 2024.

- 22 Jan declared a holiday in many states and at the Central Govt level as a half day for 'Pran Pratishtan' at Ayodhya for the Ram Mandir. 

I can feel my pran slowly fading as I voice less and less of my angst and retract myself into my shell.

And yes, I know someone will take my case for wanting riots, but it is not the violence, but the of freedom of expression that I yearn for and its loss that I lament. 

There are times when I regret joining TISS full time.

Today is one of them.

I would have in the past posted my thoughts for my thoughts would not have been equated with 'my institution' and 'my institute' would not have to bear the brunt for opinions it did not endorse. At worst, I would have been disowned as 'visiting' or 'contractual' and I would have put in my papers and walked my path. 

But now I hold back. I am thinking admissions, UGC withholding pay, TISSians targetted. Somehow, my opinion being a feeder for more hate-mongering. 

And I am not able to bring myself to do anything else as somehow, viscerally, I feel incapacitated.

I am consuming more and more and more of those who are expressing some concern, some dissent and feeling more helpless, more worthless.

As I head to Mizoram, am going to retreat into my shell. Hopefully, the mountains will revive my faith in the larger play of things and in humanity and secularism and such.

For now I share this here when I would have felt better sharing on a more public platform. I feel like Alice but in Orwellian dystopia. 

https://anuthik.blogspot.com/2024/01/reality-mirrored.html